Ghosting in the Professional World
Ghosting is a relatively new term that has emerged from the online dating world and is quickly expanding into more traditional relationships and into the professional world. It is the practice of ending a relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.
In personal relationships, it can cause some significant negative outcome for the ghosted. The uncertainty, ambiguity and social rejection may affect self-esteem and a person’s willingness to connect authentically in the future.
It is generally accepted that ghosting is a result of the ghoster avoiding their own emotional discomfort. This combined with a sense that there are fewer social consequences seems to justify the action for some. This type of behaviour was, until very recently, considered to be that committed only by scoundrels.
“ They just don’t have the courage to deal with it”
We are finding a huge increase in the number of REALTORS® that are ghosting us. They have an in-depth conversation with us about their business and the possibility of coaching. When we reach out to follow up, we hear nothing back. I am sure that you, as REALTOR® are finding the same thing happening with people you connect with about possibly serving them with their real estate needs. It’s possible that this is a result of poor sales skills, but I think that there is something else going on here. Job recruiters and employers are reporting a huge increase in job applicants and actual employees ghosting them. Imagine.
Me and my top coaches, who are highly skilled at having valuable conversations and never pushing for business are deeply concerned and surprised by this new reality. In one case, I had a series of conversations with an agent who is closely connected to our tribe about his personal and professional challenges. We shared a deep understanding and connection and then he ghosted me.
When ghosting happens in a professional context, it is the ghoster who is hurt. I think significantly less of people who ghost me or my team. Employers and recruiters who are ghosted certainly aren’t going to be helping that young professional succeed.
We have just come through a 10 year economic boom where bad behaviour had less impact than it will as both technology and a slowing economy are going to impact not just real estate, but many facets of our lives.
If you want to be a respected professional, have the courage to communicate with the people you connect with. It’s ok to say, thanks for your time but I have decided to go a different direction. It’s not ok to be a ghosting scoundrel.