This is the third blog post in a series addressing human resistance and it’s ability to keep us from obtaining what we want.

If our “WHY” is stronger than our resistance we will act.

Many of us feel some degree of resistance when we consider making sales calls.  Our decision to push through the resistance is crucial to our sales success.

If our “WHY” is stonger, we act.  If our resistance is stronger, we don’t act.

Clearly defining your “WHY” is essential to the process.

Sometimes, even when we have a clearly defined and important “WHY”, our resistance is still too strong to overcome.  Then what?

Let’s look to our personal values.  If an action is in conflict with our deep rooted, untangible and unique personal values, the result will be an uneasiness in the form of guilt, shame, deep doubts and other strong negative emotions.

An example of this from my sales career was around my value for respect and privacy.  These things matter to me at a very deep level.  When someone I knew lost a loved one to death, my value around respect and privacy overruled my desire to have a conversation with them about the sale of  the real estate – even when I had a long term trusting  relationship.  When I considered having this conversation with them I felt a deep discomfort that reached right inside my soul.  It felt wrong to me.  I knew that this was in conflict with my values.  I made the decision to step away from the resistance and not push through it.  My WHY wasn’t stronger than my resistance.  I  made a deliberate decision and it felt right.

Values are personal, intimate and unique.  People do not all share the same values.  Your values are not right or wrong – they are simply your values.  They are your compass from which you choose your actions and make your decisions.

Having a conversation with someone about helping them sell real estate after the death of a loved on is not necessarily wrong.  They may really need our services.

Knowing our values is important and it is sometimes difficult.  We have a tendancy to adopt the values of people near to us;  our parents, our spouse’s, the people in our community, role models and leaders………….and yet, our true core values are unique to us.

Do you know what really matters to you?

Clarity in values will help you know when to push through the resistance and when to step away.

Stepping away because of adopted values may cost you your dreams.